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Think Blog

Think Blog is our FREE KNOW-HOW section. An informative blog post, offering helpful questions and suggesting practical solutions. In addition to providing simple tools and tips on how young people can develop their self-belief skills in motivating themselves towards thinking, feeling, and acting GREAT, ultimately improving their wellbeing.

Whatever you do, action or inaction... Think

MIND & EMOTIONAL NURTURING

Please feel free to ask your questions, post comments, or send an email to think@mindemotionalnurturing.com

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Whatever you do (action or inaction), Think Mind Emotional Nurturing


I have lost count of how many times I have mentioned to family, friends, and even some of my clients this month ‘It’s the story you tell yourself.’ When they say things to disempower and limit their potentials. I sometimes fall into this trap due to the language I use, but I have developed the awareness to change any unhelpful #ACTs (#Anxiety Creating Thoughts)


Do you believe you cannot cope with the unhelpful negative thoughts you are experiencing and that they will never change?


Yes, in as much as it is sometimes impossible to control the thoughts that come into your mind. You have the ability to identify and modify them. Telling yourself that the unhelpful ACTs (Anxiety Creating Thoughts) are here to stay or acting #powerless, believing that you can do nothing to alter them is precisely the reality you are creating for yourself. Indeed, how the story you tell yourself affects your wellbeing.



Remember, your thought cause your feeling and action. It is time you start changing your story. You have a choice to think otherwise. Tell yourself the opposite of your unhelpful thought and keep repeating it until you start to believe it. On the other hand, find a middle ground, start with a more realistic and balanced alternative thought between your old unhelpful belief and the new one you want in improving your wellbeing.


Do you want to learn to identify and understand your thinking style?




For you to learn how to think the way you want, first, you need to identify your type of thinking.


Types of Thinking


Using the ABC Cognitive Behavioural Model, there are two distinct types of thinking involving the following:


A – Activating Events (Situation, Circumstance, Triggers, Relationships, and Social Environment)

B – Beliefs and Thoughts

C - Consequences – pleasant or unpleasant feeling / sensation in the body (emotions) - Cognition, Physical reactions , Actions and Inaction


1. A-C Thinking – This is where you believe what is being (things that exist) or what is doing (other people) make you feel and behave in the way that you do.


This thinking pattern makes you feel helpless with substantial limitations. It is a belief that events and others around you control you, and they have to change before you can. Also, you have no control over you.


The belief that external circumstances cause how you feel and act can keep you in a vicious cycle with no rest. This is because things will ‘always’ be happening around you, and this can lead to #stress, #anxiety, or #depression.


2. B-C Thinking – This eliminates the feeling of helplessness associated with the ‘A-C’ Thinking because you understand that YOU determine your feelings and actions, rather than anything external. You realise that the meaning you give to what is being and what is doing, your interpretation of the event, which include your assumptions, opinions, and core beliefs, determine your feelings in creating your reality.


The B-C thinking can make you feel limitless, liberated, and empowered, knowing that you are in control. Yes, you will still have some automatic thoughts (Positive or Negative). However, you remain in control and know you have the power to keep, amend, or reframe from unhelpful #ACTs Anxiety Creating Thoughts.


Think Mind Emotional Nurturing _ How to Think.

  1. The Self-Coaching Model: Your thought creates your feeling and action. Taking psychological responsibility and adopting the new belief that while most things might be outside your control, your thoughts, feelings, and actions are within your control.

  2. Thinking about Thinking: Spot and start changing your unhelpful beliefs about what you are thinking. Whether you are making it mean something about yourself, others, or the world; dropping it all and #BeingCurious is a helpful start.

  3. Think on Purpose: Learn to and match your thought with your feelings, and control your actions using your brain (#Neuroplasticity) in creating feelings of confidence.

You can achieve all this, but first, you want to learn to balance your being and doing.



 

Bibliography


Neenan, M. and Palmer, S. (2012) Cognitive Behavioural Coaching in Practice: An Evidence Based Approach London: Routledge




What one thing could you do today in getting out of your way?


Have you suddenly realized that you are getting in your way, or has someone advised or suggested this to you? A starting point of getting out of your way is to change your thinking about what it is that you are obstructing. The ABC Model of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help you achieve this.


Do you know…


1. What exactly are you hindering yourself from achieving?

2. How are you stopping yourself from reaching your goals?

3. What are you currently doing or not doing?


The ABC Model


After identifying your goals, you want to determine the current thoughts, feelings & actions relating to this issue. It can be helpful to work out how to identifying your thoughts backward as your behaviour can seem more evident than the spotting your thought. So,


  • What habit are you currently involved in and want to change? This is usually an unhelpful behavior (action or inaction)

  • What feeling motivated that action (name the pleasant or unpleasant emotion)?

  • What are your thoughts behind the feeling (One thought at a time)?


Then, ACE your thoughts


  1. Accept the identified thought as just thought, an idea in your brain, or a situation that might have occurred, and you are looking to change your response in the future.

  2. Challenge the unhelpful thought once confirmed. You might want to get a pen and paper to write down your thoughts when you spot them.

  3. Exchange each thought with a more balanced, alternative thinking. If you are feeling lucky, you can try the opposite of your initial thought, and see how you feel.


Think Mind Emotional Nurturing


In every situation, you want to remember to apply the ABC cognitive-behavioral model. The idea that it is not external circumstances (what is existing or who is doing what) that cause your action. Instead, it is your thought about what is being and doing that makes you feel and act.


Do you want to understand what is happening to you (Your Current Situation in understanding your Thought, Feelings, and Actions)?



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